Tuesday Ten

Okay, this isn’t the same as a Ten On Tuesday, which is a prewritten list of ten questions to answer. Tuesday Ten is where I get to list ten things that totally piss me off.

I slept on it, yep, took a nap this morning and am still in a pissy mood so you guys get a Tuesday Ten from me anyway…brace yourself, it isn’t pretty.

 

 

1. I hate not being able to smoke in my home. When I first get up in the morning I want a stupid cigarette and a cup of coffee. I prefer not to stand in the rain, gear up because its 30° outside or have to get dressed to do this.

2. People, especially kids (grown), that tell you they want you to be happy. Yeah right, as long as you don’t do anything in the world that might upset their precious lifestyles. God forbid they should have to clean their own bathrooms, wash some dishes, clean their cats’ litter box, get a job. This chick ain’t playing the fucking whore just to keep step-daddy’s money coming in for you.

3. Same goes to ex-husbands that lie through their teeth just to keep you under their control. I’m gone, go on…pretend I’m dead. I find that is the easiest way to deal with someone leaving. What would you do if they were dead. I don’t mean wish them dead – just what the hell would you do if they had died. You’d go on with your life, duh.

3. People that tell you what a sucky parent, lover, wife, housekeeper, money manager and then get pissy when you disappear out of their lives. Strangely enough they can’t even be happy when I’m not there fucking things up. Oh wait, maybe it wasn’t me after all and they have to look in the mirror for a change. (see #3)

4. People that assume things. Accuse someone of something long enough and they will do it. Period. Hell, why not, they may as well enjoy doing some of the shit they’re getting accused. Wait, I even messed that one up. I’m with someone else but am divorced. Shit, can’t even get that one right.

5. I hate, hate, hate that I feel guilty about being happy. How many times do you think its healthy to downplay your life just so no one is jealous or realizes just how crappy their lives are? I am not always happy, but I am happy more times than not. In fact, 99.9% of the time I am in a good space and love life. So back off and quit trying to make me question it. Oh, and guess what! I bought a $5 lottery ticket (the only one I have ever and will ever purchase) and won $65. Take that you unhappy, unlucky bastards!

6. Men that talk down to or about their wives. Hussy, husserial unit, wifey, ball and chain are NOT terms of endearment. Men that look at porn (mags or movies) telling their wives or girlfriends that they do it to enhance their sexual performance or spice up the relationship. When guys even so much as do the ‘extended stare’ at a beautiful woman passing by it just lets us know how defective you think we are body-wise.

7. Women that allow #6 to continue. I fall into this category so don’t attack me on it.

8. Born again Christians, newborns especially, that want to save everyone and everything on the planet. AND recovering alcoholics.

9. People calling me lazy because I can efficiently knock out my errands and clean our apartment from top to bottom by noon – which leaves me plenty of time to read, meditate, walk on the beach and just flat out enjoy my life. Shit, can even throw a nap in there since I’m up at 4:30a every morning.

10. My top peeve for the day is people who keep telling me what I need to be doing, but can’t seem to do it themselves. If they stayed on themselves half as much as they stay on me then they could be making a hell of a lot of progress on bettering themselves.