Pears And Crayons

I have a nickname: BCnaat (pronounced: bee-cee-nat). Its an an acronym for bad case no as ‘atal. My first husband came up with this, and it kind of stuck. I am the inspiration for the stick person drawings you see. No butt, no boobs, tall, and stick-like.

I have been an extremely thin person my entire adult life. So thin that this is the standard conversation between nurses, doctors and me that happens ev-er-y time:

Intake nurse: “Do you have an eating disorder?”
Me: “Yes, I eat anything and everything but still can’t gain weight?”

Doctor: “You are very thin, do you have an eating disorder?”
Me: “Yes, I eat anything and everything but still can’t gain weight? Can you help me gain weight?”

I’ve only had one doctor that remembered me when I came to see him. I can’t afford him anymore. He not only helped get my mood swings under control but also helped me learn how to gain weight. A whole 10 pounds that I can’t seem to keep on me steadily.

Even though I have managed to keep my weight at 124-127 pounds (I’m 5’9” and naked I resemble a skeleton with skin) it is pooling on my body. It isn’t pretty. Lately it seems to have gone from a spare tire state to actually a brand: Dunlap. I’m seriously thinking that I need to buy high waist jeans again so I can tuck in my belly.

I checked the roots of my hair the other day. Yes, I need to invest in hair color. I have seriously been thinking of just letting it salt and pepper on out. Act my age kind of thing BUT vanity takes over and I color again. Oh, my roots…

I discovered that they are no longer salt and pepper but gray. Almost white? My mother was 60 before she scored the beautiful white hair that she has now. Before it was that harsh gray that looked as course as a wire brush.

So I came up with this to prepare me for my obvious future look:

Maybe a better title would have been pears and PhotoShop but I bet crayons got your attention better ;)